Hello hello! Welcome to RightSwipeGirl!
I am Marilee Grace. Author. Speaker. Founder and Lead Life Transformation Coach at RightSwipeGirl. But how did I get here? I'm glad you asked! Grab your favorite beverage and pull up a chair. Let's chat
For almost as long as I can remember, I wanted to be two things when I grew up: a Rockette and a Writer. It was my dream to dance on the stage at Radio City Music Hall in New York City and be on the New York Times bestseller list. Cool if it was at the same time! I guess if I was going to dream, it might as well be BIG, right?
Well, a whole lot of life happened between those little girl dreams and RightSwipeGirl. Maybe you can relate… My best guess is it started as a slow shift. I think I was about 10 years old. Confident, ornery, curious… But I slowly started to listen to the negative voices. You know the ones.
The ones that judge you. That tell you that you aren't good enough. Pretty enough, Thin enough, Smart enough.
The ones that whisper, “What makes you think you can accomplish that big dream?”
I didn’t just listen to them, I slowly started to believe them. And slowly, I got smaller and smaller. Quieter and quieter.
In my early thirties, after several years of marriage, my smallness became more noticeable to those who knew me best…
My mom would say to me, “I just want you to find your joy again.”
I figured I was busy with life, trying to be a perfect a wife and mother. I was busy. This is how it is for women. It is just the role we are given in this season of our lives, right? Joy would be there when I wasn’t so busy trying to juggle this life. I remember yearning for a particular moment in time. A snapshot caught up in my memory. The last time I felt sheer, unbridled joy. “If I can just hang on. If I can just keep that picture in my mind. I can find that moment again.
I just need to get through all this yucky stuff and I’ll have time and a way to get back there.” It was a picture perfect place in my mind… a time before everything went haywire. I truly wanted joy in my life again, but I didn't have a clue how to get there. I thought maybe just time, enough time would pass and I’d magically be taken there again, to a place full of joy. Honestly, it would have to be magical and just happen because I was so exhausted in all areas of my life and I didn't have the capacity to even try to figure it out.
In 2018, my little brother died. I had a stroke nine months and 2 days later. And as I laid in that hospital bed for four days with nothing but tubes, doctors poking and prodding, and plenty of time, I realized my marriage had been a daily train wreck for years. I was faced with a choice: stay and let what little life I had left in me be sucked out or change. It took me two years to decide for sure and fully embrace my decision. I chose change.In September 2020, I left a 29 year marriage and chose me. I Right Swiped on me that day. I wish I could say that the day I left the heavens parted with a beam of light shining down on me while angels sang choruses of “hallelujah,” and my life was suddenly rainbows and unicorns. But that, my friends, is the fairy tale version. The real life version is not so shiny and sparkly.
As a former counselor, I hired a therapist and did some hard work. After that, I hired and worked with a coach who specialized in working with women coming out of toxic relationships. I began (and completed!) a life coach certification class that led me to my mentor and friend JG. I also met and was befriended by a baseball mom who just happened to be a New York Times best-selling author. Coincidences? Hardly!
Each of those ladies encouraged me in some way to start loving myself. That's a scary assignment. One I dodged, avoided, and ignored at all costs. You name it, I did it to stay clear of the “SL” (self-love) word. Maybe if they could have given me a manual, a guide, the right book to read? I'm a good student. I just needed the “right stuff” to figure it out. (Psst, I needed ears ready to hear the message. That is what I truly needed).
In July 2021 I ventured onto dating apps. Let me tell you, that is not a place to go if you are trying to learn self-love. But I did it anyway, and I wrote a book about it! Right Swipe! A Quest for Love, takes my readers on my crazy 15 month journey on the dating apps. It's kind of ironic because I really didn't want a man or a relationship. I just wanted someone to get me. To understand me. To be my person. And for so many years, I’d been told that in order to be complete, I needed that person. Surely I could find that person, right? After deleting the final app in October 2022, I was left exhausted. I knew I needed to figure things out. As I reflected back over my time on the apps, i began to do just that, I began to figure it out.
The end product of my time on the dating apps was a book, a self-love program, and a new purpose. The book tells about the craziness of the apps. It’s a funny, sometimes touching, tale about my experiences. That adventure led me to living my “Unleashing Self-Love” program first, myself. I didn’t realize it would become a program until I lived it. Then I wrote it out. It is my “take away” from the experiences that helped me move with confidence through the stages of liking and loving myself and how I continue to live it out each day. Finally, after travelling my journey, I realized that not only could I shift and change myself but I could teach others to do the same. And that became my purpose.I decided to rebrand my business and focus my attention on teaching other women how to begin to like and love themselves again... or maybe for the very first time.
I truly love to talk about self-love and what I learned.
Psst, self-love is not selfish, it is Essential!
I love to encourage other women to invest in themselves
I want them to ask what if… I want them to ask themselves “what if I choose to invest in myself…, what if I choose to be honoring to myself…, what if I choose to right swipe on me... what if? Here’s one of my truths: I went from a woman who hated to walk past a mirror, let alone look at myself in it, to a woman who can boldly look myself in the eye and say “Damn girl! You are f’ing beautiful!” And I want that for you, too. I want to come alongside you. I want you to see the beauty that is you!
Are you ready for a transformative change?
Are you ready for a transformative change?
I know it seems big and scary and so far out of reach. But Dear One, do it scared. Just do it scared.
Wow! Thanks for reading my Self-Love story. Can I tell you a secret, though? You can begin your own self-love story, too. If you'd like to chat, click the button to schedule a time. We can bring our favorite beverage, pull up a chair and chat. I would be honored to walk beside you as you begin to write your self-love story.